Category Archives: Love & Marriage

Six Months Married

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I rolled over this morning, half awake and got a kiss on the forehead from my lovely husband…

 

“Happy six month anniversary, baby!” he whispered.

 

I had no idea.  He is most definitely the best husband ever.

 

So I’m literally running around about to leave for work, but I wanted to put up a little something for my incredible husband.  Who I quite literally vowed to “always pick up from work when its raining to hard for you to ride your bike home.”  I love you, I love you, I love you.  I hope every six months after this is as rewarding, delicious, musical and full of love as these first ones.  I am so lucky to have you and we are so lucky to have found each other!

 

XOXO

3 oz Liquids

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I consider myself a professional traveler. I gained this title in my college years, being a Rapid Rewards member with Southwest and flying back and forth between Orlando and BWI for every break.  I know to wear shoes that are easy to slip out of at security, I can get my laptop out and in its own bin in 30 seconds flat, I check in before I get to the airport and I usually take all sharp objects out of my carry on bags.  Get behind me in a security line and I promise you will not be disappointed.

Even the new metal detector virtual strip search doesn’t really bother me. I do feel like I have to do it an unusually high percentage of the time, but whatever. Maybe one time I will write something really great on my butt in xray proof pen (does that exist?) or draw a smily face on my stomach so they can be entertained in that back room of faceless naked people xrays. It really can’t be the most interesting job in the world.

But until I get that creative, I just like to get through and get to my gate. And on the way to Miami this weekend, the guy in front of me looked pretty normal so I wasn’t too concerned.  I went through the xray thingy, raised my hands over my head, stood still, and then waited for my bag to get through. My heart dropped a little when security came around to get a bag, but they ask that guy in front of me if they can look through his carry on. Of course I’m nosy while I’m putting my flip flops back on because I have to get a look at what he got caught for.

No lie, there was a giant, unopened bottle of water in his suitcase. Like a 2 liter bottle of water.  Packed perfectly. And his come back to the security guard was “its just water”.

Duh, its just water. Where have you been the past ten years?? And where were you the last ten minutes when we waited in line next to ten BILLION signs that say no liquids over 3 ounces? Did you see all the pictures of water bottles then? With the big red circle with a slash through it? No?

Anyway, I’m sure I rolled my eyes, because that’s just what I do, and then I told everyone I was with in Miami about how this stupid guy thought he would get away with all that water. So dumb.

So now I’m back at Miami International and I used my awesome boarding pass that was just a QR code on my phone and I’m going through security, feeling all cocky, when they bring out MY bag and ask if they can go through it.

I had a freaking water bottle.

The only excuse I can give is that I have a super Miami hangover and I must be out of practice. It really isn’t like me. Really.

I’d also like to personally apologize to the guy in LAX who I made so much fun of.  What karma.

See you in L.A….

Toast

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World, meet Johnny Toast.

Turns out this character – who is in fact, a real person – came along with the package when I started dating Brad.  He hides in the Sig Ep composites between 1988 and 1992 that hang on the walls of a bar in Ithaca called ‘The Chapter House”.

And now he is a huge part of my life.

I learned early on in my relationship with Brad that he had a friend he called Johnny Toast.  I knew his real name was Steven, but he was in Brad’s phone as Johnny Toast and he was usually just called “Toast”.  And before I had been to Ithaca, Brad couldn’t explain the nickname to me.  He just swore he would just show me one day.

Doesn’t that picture just explain why you have to see it in person?

Maybe this one will give you some more information…

All of the other 1988 SigEps are completely normal 1988 Cornell University students.  Nice suits, nice ties, neat hair and a pleasant frat-boy smile.

Not Toast.

First of all, his real name is John Santos, but doesn’t go by that.  He is the only one on the composite with his nickname included and the only one rocking a mullet and those fly 1988 sunglasses.  He is just so FRESH!

Steven and Brad were immediately drawn to this fly mentor-from-another-generation and started using “Toast” not just as a nickname, but as a real way of life.  Words like “Toast-mostest” were added to their vocabulary.  I have Toast coasters (Toasters.  Serious.) in my apartment.  Toast became an icon among all who knew them.  How did he come to be so fly??

Believe me, we have done many a late-night intoxicated Google search to try and find out more about this man of mystery. You know, just to see where all that freshness got him.  And to see how much more fly he could have possibly gotten after graduation.  I bet he wears Louboutin slippers and a velvet robe and just smokes cigars all day.  And I bet he NEVER takes off his sunglasses.  I mean, just LOOK at him!

I wish they had Facebook back in 1988, because no one can find Toast.

My little sister, Nicki, has been to the Chapter House and knows all about Toast.  She can find anything online.  Stuff that I wouldn’t even know could be online, she finds it online.

Nicki couldn’t find Toast.

But one day she was at a coffee shop in Delaware where they happened to have a few old Cornell yearbooks laying around.  There he was – Mr. Toast – in the black and white pictures with his other Sig Ep brothers in a Delaware coffee shop.

My faith in Nicki’s searching abilities were restored with that picture message.

Sadly, I am lead to believe Johnny’s freshness didn’t last too much longer after his freshman year.  We don’t really like to admit it, but this picture of Toast hangs at the Chapter Room also.  It’s from 1991.

Still rocking that party-in-the-back hair cut, but maybe he was over the shades by ’91.  And what happened to the “Toast”?  Is this the more mature Toast?  More undercover?  Was it just cloudier that day?

We will never know.

We pretty much gave up our search when Steven’s mom, who works at Cornell, couldn’t even find him through alumni records.  And after Nicki’s failed Googling, we put our search for John “Toast” Santos on the back burner.

I think at one point we were looking to send him an invitation to our wedding.  I had probably been drinking when that decision had been made.  He never got his invite, but don’t worry, he was definitely there in spirit.  The boys made sure of that.  No mullets (or pants, apparently) required.